Here at The Farnc we not only have such riveting posts as Tacos with Sour Cream and Take a Seat, we also have the best caption contest in the history of blogging.
If your entry is selected by our judges as the Ultimate Best Caption in the History of This Contest, not only will you win the chance to guest post at this wonderful site, but I will personally send you a crisp dollar bill. That's right. One dollar. Who said you can't make money from blogging?
This deal is a lot better than AdSense, where it takes two years to meet the payout threshold, and then when your account is reviewed for payment authorization Google rears up and says, "No money for you! You cheated somehow. We will not pay you! Account suspended!"
But I digress.
I, Doug Stephens, will send you that dollar. Guaranteed. I won't even ask for a fifty-cent entrance fee up front, although I was tempted.
Ready for that picture to caption? It's a doozy.
So sit back, put on your thinking cap (or pants, or whatever you put on to think) and caption this picture.
I know. It scares me, too.
The deadline for entries is 11:59 a.m., Friday, June 17, Central U.S. time.
Or if this picture leaves you speechless, you can just read the crap we put up here, such as Asha and the Elvis Impersonator. Either way, I'm sure you will have a moderately pleasing time.
*Captions from Admins are not eligible for the $1 prize.
milk does a body good
ReplyDeletepeaches and cream anyone
ReplyDeleteHahaha. I can tell this is going to be a fun blog. I'm going to have to ponder my caption submission though...
ReplyDeletePour as much milk over me as you like, I am NOT going to give Coconut Boy a free manscaping.
ReplyDeleteI am completely freaked out by seeing someone other than the admins even comment. Now...to find a loophole in the admin.
ReplyDeleteJames was completely shocked once he learned he had been duped into contributing for the "Money Shot" Liz was willing to take to the face.
ReplyDeleteI don't believe in loopholes unless they work in my favor.
ReplyDeleteWhy does that guy have Doug in a headlock?
ReplyDeleteGot degenerates?
ReplyDeleteThe camera man is getting some action.
ReplyDeleteGetting the white fluid of 3 men over you while you cousins, daughters, brothers child that he has with your uncle watches.
ReplyDeleteGot milk?
ReplyDeleteLeslie and the boys prepare for a good FARNCing.
ReplyDeleteI wouldn't want to participate in this even if I could. That picture is pure evil. I warn you all now, that picture will bring you nothing but misery. It's insidious. It will get inside of your head and refuse to let go. It's like a computer program designed to turn you into a pervert. Before long you'll be scouring the internet looking for "milk fetish porn", hoping that such a thing even exist. You'll find yourself lurking around gym shower rooms with a glass of milk, lying in wait for your opportunity. It will turn you into a shallow husk of a human being. Don't say I didn't warn you.
ReplyDeleteI suddenly enjoy cow-tipping a lot more...Should I be worried?
ReplyDeleteI thought cow tipping was a myth because cows really don't sleep standing up...
ReplyDeleteI could see Scott on a mission to complete a mythical quest.
ReplyDeleteGive us the secret of your stunning good looks or next time it won't be 2%, it will be whole milk!
ReplyDeleteNooooooooooo!!!!!
This blog its stupid and point less.
ReplyDeleteI was going to comment, but I see your blog is stupid and point less. Damn, I had a life-changing caption as well...
ReplyDeleteDamn you, Anonymous! Your persuative non-grammatical critique has poisoned Paul against us. He left a comment saying he would have left a comment if not for your comment.
ReplyDeleteI would just like to point out to Anonymous that his sentence is not a proper sentence.
ReplyDeleteIt should read, "This blog is stupid and pointless."
Or perhaps you were trying to make a caption?
"This Blog: it's stupid and pointless."
"Its" is possessive, and it is impossible that this blog owns stupid and pointless. "It's" is the proper way of saying, "It is." Also, pointless is one word, not two.
And our blog may very well be stupid, but the point is that it amuses us. "Us" meaning the Administrators and the bored individuals who have chosen to follow us.
I extend my deepest condolences to you for being unable to appreciate our humor, but it doesn't change anything.
I wonder if this anon is *my* anon or if "it's" the anon who bashes Doug or the anon of anons that go around stating how everything sucks, without providing anything of substance to show why.
ReplyDeleteAnons are, generally speaking, trolls with nothing better to do. And I generally don't respond to them. But, you know, sometimes it's fun to rise to the challenge.
ReplyDelete"The staff of FARNC celebrates the launch of their new blog by valiantly trying to prove they are not all, in fact, homosexuals. Not understanding how or why straight people have sex they fail dramatically."
ReplyDeleteSweetheart, if I ever find myself attracted to women, I won't see anything wrong with it so long as she doesn't eat poop or expect me to do it.
ReplyDeleteI think you're wasting your breath...or, maybe finger padding??...whatever you would waste typing if you were addressing morons.
ReplyDeleteI thought the purpose of this blog was to address morons? Damn it! Can someone please supply me a manual. To the one who dabbles in feces, I think Chanel is clearly a homo.
ReplyDeleteDamn, you guys found me out. Well, so much for my pretenses. Now I'm going to have to go out and find lesbian things to do. But do I have to cut my hair? It's so pretty when it's long.
ReplyDeleteThat picture is still one of the most horrifying things I've seen. Apparently, we should add in our headline that our blog is also stupid and pointless.
ReplyDeleteIt may be stupid, but I stand by my assertion that it is not pointless!
ReplyDeleteHmm, I would argue that it's pointless, but not stupid.
ReplyDeleteOkay, maybe it's a little stupid.
OR maybe we should change all the "insanity"s in the background to "stupid"s and "pointless"s.
ReplyDeleteI think I could do that. Should I poll it first or just go for it?
ReplyDeleteThe all new season of Jersey shore features deleted scenes like never before!
ReplyDeleteWell that one made me laugh, but I think we're way past June 17th.
ReplyDeleteBy the way, Doug, did we ever select a winner for that dollar?